Speak Out

Damn!

2008-03-24T16:08:15+01:00

Damn! I'm jobless! How the hell did this happen!?

Oh I remember... it happens when you *THIS PART OF THE BLOG HAS BEEN OMMITTED DUE TO CONSTRAINTS AGAINST FREEDOM OF SPEECH AND THE PRESS*!

Don't know what I'll do now... life really sucks... really...

I still have Hannah... She's all I've got now...but for how long?

I'm scared; terrified.

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Jok-a #3

2008-03-20T04:51:55+01:00

Q. How many bouncers does it take to throw someone down the stairs?

A. None! He fell.

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Jok-a #2

2008-03-20T04:48:28+01:00

How about this one?? . . . .

A teacher was wrapping up class, and started talking about tomorrow's final exam. He said there would be no excuses for not showing up tomorrow.
One smart ass, male student said, "What about extreme sexual exhaustion?", and the whole classroom burst into laughter.

After the laughter had subsided, the teacher glared at the student, and said, "Not an excuse, you can use your other hand to write."

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Jok-a #1

2008-03-20T04:46:45+01:00

Seeing Eye Dogs

Two buddies were out for a Saturday stroll. One had a Doberman and the other had a Chihuahua. As they sauntered down the street, the guy with the Doberman said to his friend, "Let's go over to that bar and get something to drink." The guy with the Chihuahua said, "We can't go in there. We've got dogs with us."

The one with the Doberman said, "Just follow my lead." They walked over to the bar and the guy with the Doberman put on a pair of dark glasses and started to walk into the bar. The bouncer at the door said, "Sorry, Mac, no pets allowed."

The man with the Doberman said, "You don't understand. This is my Seeing-Eye dog." The bouncer said, "A Doberman pinscher?" The man said, "Yes, they're using them now. They're very good." The bouncer said, "OK then, come on in." The buddy with the Chihuahua figured he'd try it too so he put on a pair of dark glasses and started to walk into the bar. He knew his story would be a bit more unbelievable. Once again the bouncer said,
"Sorry, pal, no pets allowed." The man with the Chihuahua said, "You don't understand. This is my Seeing-Eye dog."

The bouncer said, "A Chihuahua?" The man with the Chihuahua said, "A Chihuahua?!? A Chihuahua?!? They gave me a damn Chihuahua???"

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Hannah

2008-03-20T04:39:23+01:00

H.A.N.N.A.H Dedicated to Hannah

She is my best friend
and that rare sunshine
on a cloudy miserable day...

She walks into a room and lights it up...

My smoothie true friend and lover;
the friend everyone likes and is always
there for others, can be a right gay;
aright irritating pain...

But at the end of the day
She loves me and I love her...

She is a true friend only to those
that deserve her as a friend...

She is my strength and one of a kind...

Her smile, presence and laughter
brings joy to others...

She is a pleasure to know, and have as a friend;
I love her...

-Adapted from Manasseh Bailey's original version.

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All night long...

2008-03-19T07:25:36+01:00

I stayed up all night long... I'm exhausted and feel a little sick. The worst part? I have to get up for work today and GET THROUGH an entire day and an entire night on the doors at the illustrious Queenshilling...

OH DEAR!

Whatever am I like...

But I can't really help myself I suppose... between the millions of thoughts racing through my brain (HANNAH) and the inter-web, I guess sleep tonight wasn't meant to be...

RUBBISH! (Don't even know if I'm making any sense! - Homesickness is debilitating!)

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Homesick...

2008-03-19T05:45:30+01:00

Ok, so here I sit listening to an American patriotic song. The words are getting to me... because I'm so terribly homesick.

Know why it's called "homesick"? Because it really does feel like a sickness inside you. I miss my family and friends back home so much that I cry myself to sleep at night sometimes. You may think that the easy solution to this problem is for me to go home... but that's easier said than done.

You see, since living here in England I've become something more than I ever thought I could be in America. I always struggled when I was at home and no matter how many loving people I had around me, I always felt so terribly hopeless.

America is an amazing place... I don't think I could begin to even try and describe how good it can be (present government excepted). It's a great big place full of dreams and opportunities; places you could never find anywhere else and the pride of an American seems to transcend everything else I've seen. But with all of these things comes also the hard edge, the under-belly of the beast... I've seen crime and poverty there which is heart wrenching. Gangs and warfare in the streets, I was even a part of that desolation once... using drugs and scraping the bottom just to struggle along with nothing.

It's that which I've seen and once done myself that keeps me far away from my home. I am terrified of what I'll become if I return. America is a land of opportunity yes, the problem is that the opportunities are both negative as well as positive and I am not strong enough when I am there to stay in the positive.

It's was never easy for me growing up... those of you who know me, know that I was raised by my grandmother... that's because there was no mother or father for me as a child. My birth parents chose drugs and crime over me and my sisters and brothers. The up-side to this is that when I was 21 the two most beatiful people I know took over my parenting. The people I call mom and dad mean everything to me... yet I am afraid to tell them I am not going home. I am afraid they will be angry and hurt and so I have not spoken to them for months.

How can I tell them I changed my mind... how can I show them how proud I am to be an American, proud to be called thier daughter and yet too afraid of BIG BAD AMERICA to move back home? And then there are so many reasons to stay here in England... almost too many to count. I love this country and I've been here so long that this is also my home. I want to stay here where I feel safe- even though I am hurting so badly right now because of my present situation I feel like dying sometimes these days. yet the fact remains that still I feel safe here, I have hope and I feel like I have a chance if I just try hard enough.

I guess I've rambled on in this... and I have to go now... maybe I'll come back and write more once I've thought more about it.

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Her ring...

2008-03-10T14:47:42+01:00

Close to the door she paused to stand
as she took her ring off her hand.

All who were watching didn't dare speak,
as a silent tear rolled down her cheek
all through her mind the memories ran
of the moments they'd walked and laughed in the sand.

But now her eyes were so terribly cold
for she never again would have her to hold.

They all watched in silence as she bent near
and whispered the words "I love you" in her ear.

She touched her face and started to cry
as she put on her ring and wanted to die.

And just as the wind began to blow,
they lowered her casket into the snow.

-Adapted from Ed Boring's original version.

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Inner Peace:

2008-02-14T05:13:17+01:00

Inner Peace:

I have been told that a way to achieve inner peace is to finish
the things I have started.

Today I finished two bags of potato chips and a chocolate cake!
I feel more peaceful already!

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FROM THE VAULTS OF MAYA ANGELOU'S BEST

2007-04-18T20:29:04+02:00

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....
Enough money within her control to move out And rent a place of her own
even if she never wants To or needs to...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .....
Something perfect to wear if the employer or date of her Dreams wants to
see her in an hour...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
A youth she's content to leave behind....

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....
A past juicy enough that she's looking forward to Retelling it in her
old age....

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .....
A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black Lace bra...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....
One friend who always makes her laugh... And one who Lets her cry...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....
A good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone Else in her
family...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....
Eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a Recipe for a meal
that will make her guests feel honored...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....
A feeling of control over her destiny...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
How to fall in love without losing herself..

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
HOW TO QUIT A JOB,
BREAK UP WITH A LOVER,
AND CONFRONT A FRIEND WITHOUT RUINING THE FRIENDSHIP...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
When to try harder... And WHEN TO WALK AWAY...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
That she can't change the length of her calves, The width of her hips,
or the nature of her parents..

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
That her childhood may not have been perfect...but it's Over...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
What she would and wouldn't do for love or more...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
How to live alone... Even if she doesn't like it...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
Whom she can trust,
Whom she can't,
And why she shouldn't
Take it personally...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
Where to go...
Be it to her best friend's kitchen table...
Or a charming inn in the woods...
When her soul needs soothing...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
What she can and can't accomplish in a day...
A month...and a year...

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the pain...

2007-01-03T07:55:06+01:00

the pain

the pain that you feel,
but can't touch.
a pain that you know of,
but can't explain
a pain so fierce
you go insane
the unknown pain
that clutches at your heart
and burns in your soul
the pain
in your life
too strong to carry on
the unknown pain
that clouds your mind
and devours your every thought
the pain of broken promises
broken dreams
the pain
that's unheard of
the pain
that's not seen

rhiannon m franklin

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Where do I stand?

2006-10-06T22:55:05+02:00

Sometimes life seems like it's just a little too hard. I know you all know what I mean; we've all heard the expression "when it rains, it pours" haven't we? In the last couple of years so many different situations have occured in my own life that sometimes I stop and wonder where do I really stand?

It's hard to find your way when you feel as lost as I have in recent times. I guess what I'm really trying to say is that at the end of the day we're all very much the same. We all laugh, love, hurt and scream. We've all got our own demons and even though sometimes it feels like we're all on our own, I guess that's just not true. I have friends and I have my family... and even though they are far away and sometimes I don't agree with them, they are always still there for me.

Maybe where I stand is this: strong because I have a support sytem behind me no matter what. And, as I'll do well to remember this - and count my blessings, my wish for the rest of you is to remember to count your own blessings.

Take care to you all and if anyone needs me, know that I am always here for you. I guess this is a soppy sort of blog to post... but maybe I'm just in that mood.

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